Funny and Silly Wedding Vows to Make You and Your Guests Laugh
By Nina Callaway, About.com
Here are some examples of funny wedding vows:
I (Name), take you, (Name) to be my lawfully wedded (husband/wife) and chief tennis doubles partner, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, for when we win and the very very rare occasion when we lose. I promise to love, honor, and cherish you, to return your serves and do my best not to foot fault. This I vow to you.
I (name), take you (name), to be my beloved wife. I promise to love you and be your faithful partner, for better for worse, for richer, for poorer, when the Jets are winning, and when they are losing, in sickness, and in health, and in Jets-induced sickness. I will be true and loyal, and cherish you for all the days of our lives.
I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, for even poorer when I've been shopping a lot, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.
And of course, don't forget the Dr. Seuss funny wedding vows!
By Nina Callaway, About.com
It is traditional for a couple to exchange wedding rings after they say their vows. Since these rings are symbols of the marriage, the words said during a ring exchange should reflect the couple's hopes for their marriage. These words may be simply incorporated into the wedding vows, or treated as a separate ritual. Here is some example wording to use during your ring exchange or ring ceremony:
Secular/Non Denominational Vows for the Ring Exchange
I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness. As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you. I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day.
This ring is a token of my love. I marry you with this ring, with all that I have and all that I am
I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and the desire of my heart
I give you this ring to wear with love and joy. As a ring has no end, neither shall my love for you. I choose you to be my (wife / husband) this day and forevermore.
This ring I give to you as a token of my love and devotion to you. I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your (husband/wife). With this ring, I gladly marry you and join my life to yours.
I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you."
I give you this ring in God's name, as a symbol of all that we have promised and all that we shall share.
I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to be with you as long as I live.
I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be a faithful partner to you.
I give you this ring as a symbol of my love, my faith in our strength together, and my covenant to learn and grow with you
Let this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and a reminder of my devotion to you. I am honored to call you my (wife/husband).
With this ring, I thee wed, and with it, I bestow upon thee all the treasures of my mind, heart, and hands.
(Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my love. As it encircles your finger, may it remind you always that you are surrounded by my enduring love.
Response: I will wear it gladly. Whenever I look at it, I will remember this joyous day and the vows we've made.
I have for you a golden ring. The most precious metal symbolizes that your love is the most precious element in my life. The ring has no beginning and no ending, which symbolizes that the love between us will never cease. I place it on your finger as a visible sign of the vows which have made us husband and wife.
Because this ring is perfectly symmetrical, it signifies the perfection of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be.
Response: Because this ring has no end or beginning, it signifies the continuation of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be.
Religious Vows for the Ring Ceremony
I give you this ring as a symbol of my love; and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
(Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
Harey at mekuddeshet li b'taba'at zo k'dat Moshe v'Israel (which means, Behold, thou art consecrated unto me with this ring according to the law of Moses and of Israel).
This ring I give you, in token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love.
In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, take and wear this ring as sign of my love and faithfulness.
With this ring, I wed you, and pledge you my love, now and forever.
I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness. Receive this ring as a token of wedded love and faith.
I give you this ring as a sign of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have; I honor you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
With this ring I thee wed, and all my worldly goods I thee endow. In sickness and in health, in poverty or in wealth, till death do us part.
No traditional exchange of rings
Rings are traditionally exchanged during the mangni, a betrothal ceremony, but not during the wedding itself.
Traditions vary, particularly within different regions of India. Most Hindus exchange a necklace called a thaali or thirumangalyam in Southern India or called a mangalsutra in Northern India. You might say: "Praying the Almighty that I be blessed with a long life, I tie this knot around your neck. Oh! Sowbhagyavati, may Providence bestow on you a fulfilling life of a 'Sumangali' for a hundred years to come!"